Furbabies After Real Babies

A few months ago our dogs were our babies. I genuinely worried if I would love the baby as much as I loved the precious animals.


Newsflash! I love the human baby exponentially more than the pups. I still love the dogs. I just don’t like them all the time.

They have the worst timing, ever. They always seem to need to go out as soon as I sit down to feed the baby. Or they’ll spot the neighbor’s cat outside and go apeshit right after I get him to take a nap. Or a rabbit! Or some deer! Have I mentioned our house backs up to the forrest? Yeah, it happens all day, every day. Sometimes halfway through the next feeding, one if them will trot on over a vomit at my feet.

Thanks, guys.

I will say, they’re good around the baby (we play a lot on the floor right now, so that’s important) so I can’t complain too much. Everyone is safely coexisting, and that’s all that matters, right?

This morning. Oh this morning. A comedy of errors you guys.

I sit down to feed the baby, who is extremely fussy lately. Like, if some teeth don’t pop out of him soon, I will be shocked and might be in need of an exorcist.

So I sit down to feed him, and the little dog is behind me in the front bay window and starts barking at some one walking by, or a bird, or nothing because he’s out to get me at this point. So Gus is distracted. Then I hear the sounds of scratching and tearing coming from the back room, where the big dog is.

Great. Is she destroying something? Did some wee animal get in, and now I’ll have to deal with it’s murdered little body? So I pick up the still eating baby and walk back to check it out.

She’d somehow found a piece of her bag of food (which Mike opened this morning) and ripped it to shreds.

Now the little dog is howling at something out front, and the big one is running away from me so I can’t tell her how bad she is.

I need to clean up the mess, and I decide I want to corral the dogs into the back room and kitchen so the baby can eat, sleep and play in peace and I don’t have to look at their sweet stupid faces.

So Gus goes into the Pack n’ Play which he tolerates only because he’s recently eaten.

I spend the next five minutes trying to trap the dogs in the back room. I’d get one in and the other would escape. I finally trap the big one, and the little one is afraid to walk into the foyer and past the baby gate, because he’s afraid of ev.ery.thing. You can’t grab him, or move too fast or yell, because he’ll just respond by peeing everywhere. So I coax him into the room with the promise of a treat.

I do all of this with my boob hanging out, and a nipple shield stuck to my skin.

I clean up the mess, I get the dogs some treats. Gus starts crying.

I realize the (clear!) nipple shield has fallen off somewhere on the first floor of the house.

I need to find it so I can wash it so I can feed the now screaming baby.

So, of course, the doorbell rings.

I figure it’s just UPS or something and ignore it. But it keeps ringing.

Howling dogs. Screaming baby. Someone waiting impatiently at the door. Boob still out.

It’s BGE here to upgrade my gas meter. Great. Go to town.

I found the shield and we’re back in business. Gus has (temporarily at least) stopped crying and fallen asleep. So have the dogs.

I love it when everyone is sleeping.



9 thoughts on “Furbabies After Real Babies

  1. I worry about bringing the babies home and having them compete for my love of the dogs, so you were not alone in this. 🙂 I’m pretty sure I will dislike them often, given that I’ll have 4 sentient beings who have THINGS that they WANT and DO and for whom I am responsible. I hope, like yours, ours at least get along, too!

    • Thankfully even if I leave them gated in the back, they have free range of two rooms, a big window to lay in and their own sofa to take over plus all their toys. So I don’t feel horrible about it. Once the baby is more active and a little sturdier I can play with them more.

  2. Me too! I worry that a) I won’t love baby as much as my pup, but I also worry that b) baby will steal my love for my precious puppy. So basically I’m just worried all around, I don’t want either to happen, haha. I want to love both equally and don’t want our relationship with our first (fur) baby to change. Sigh. Thanks for some insight into the future though! 😉

  3. Oh my gosh you poor thing. Such chaos. We have a huge chocolate lab, and while I always knew he was kind of annoying (follows no commands, stinks, generally mischievous), it never became more apparent until the baby arrived.
    His timing is the worst. Sometimes I feel like between taking care of the 2 of them I look and feel like an absolute crazy person. I feel your pain!

  4. I totally get what ur saying. I still like my dog but he’s a lot of trouble now. Even when he’s being good, he’s still a lot of work on top of caring for the baby. We just don’t have the same relationship anymore. Which is fine.

  5. haha funny story! gus is so beautiful. you were in my (hormone laced) dreams last night, along with megan h, kristen h and lauren b. lb was pregnant?! and you of course were driving the car we were in to go to a frat party(?!) but you went off the path and were like dodging trees in the woods. (maybe it was yr backyard?) i dunno. i was also desperately trying to get to a place called tiger mtn, which upon waking ben informed me is a hipster bar. huh. love ya, keep me posted about asheville.xoxo

  6. I love this post. I think it’s a common thing. I feel the same way about my cat. I remember thinking “if the babies are allergic to him, too bad, he’s not going anywhere”. Now I wish my mom didn’t have an evil cat so she could take mine. I’ve loved cats my entire life. My first cat I had for 19 years. My cat now got me through a tough time in my life. But now since my hands are always on baby stuff and I don’t have lots of time for constant hand washing, I’m grossed out by cat litter dust. My poor kitty 😦
    Why do water and electric people think they can just show up unannounced? Ours here did this obnoxious door bell ringing pattern. Wtf-babies sleeping here dude! Lol I need a sign “wake the baby, and you’re stuck here until he stops crying”.

  7. haha this sounds just like me with our two dogs – aka the first babies. Sadly, there are more days than not lately where we think why did we decide to get two dogs in the first place!? I’m pretty sure they’re depressed from a severe lack of attention, which adds dog guilt on top of mom guilt. :0)

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