A few days ago, on 11/11/11 everyone was probably making wishes at 11:11.
I didn’t because I forgot.
But if I had — I would’ve hoped it went something like this:
Are you looking’ at me?! Did you rub my lamp?!
I’d want a sassy Genie.
Man, I loved that movie. Do I own that movie? I don’t think I do. Smoop — buy it for me for Christmas!
Anyway — if I had three wishes, they’d go a little something like this.
#1. Babies. Awesome babies. Tall babies. Short babies. Fat babies, for sure. Whenever I want them. Babies everywhere!
#2. You know what would be the best thing, ever? Some kind of pill you could take, or maybe a cream you could rub on your body to make fat disappear. Because I don’t mind fruits and vegetables, and I actually like to exercise, but I don’t have all day people. It would also be fantastic if you could make that fat reappear on your enemies.
#3. Everyone always says they want to win the lottery, but I feel like horrible things happen to lottery winners. No. I’d rather have a magical power, so that every time I put my hand in any pocket, $20 would appear. Reach in there a few times a day, and you don’t have to worry about paying for anything. I feel like that’s someone else’s wish — maybe Jason’s? But it’s a good one, so I’m taking it.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I might watch some Disney movies.